Stupid things someone needs to fix

1. Every damn restaurant in the United States saying something on their menu is "World Famous" or "Home of the World's Best [insert food item here]. I was down to the States with my brother-in-law Shadow delivering Canadian pharmaceuticals to his sister Opal in Buffalo NY. Well, when lunch rolled around we couldn't decide between "The World's Best BBQ", "World Famous Chili", or "Home of the Biggest Burger in the World". We chose the burger, mostly on account of chili gives Shadow the fiercest smelling gas you've ever experienced, and I wasn't about to be in a car with that for 3 hours. The burger wasn't the biggest I'd ever had, so I don't see how it could be the biggest in the world. Maybe they meant "The Biggest In Buffalo". I'd guess it was about 1/4 kilo of ground meat. It might have been the "Driest and most Tasteless Burger in the World". I get like this every time I come to the States. Everywhere else in the world people are proud of their whatever and say things like "try our delicious chicken" or "chili is our speciality". But the USA is always assuming they have the best and biggest of everything. The only thing they seem to be best and biggest in is Stupidity. Hell, I'm helping a guy drive prescription drugs to his sister because the damn health care system in the USA is for crap. It wouldn't be that hard to fix but I guess the USA would rather be on par with Uganda and Iraq with their health plans.
2. Little catsup packages. Who the hell designed those retarded things? There isn't enough catsup in those little bastards to cover a dill chip for Pete's sake! You need 10 of the damn things to get enough on the plate to eat your potato fries with. And they always give you two or three at the counter. Damn those are annoying. But I love watching people squeeze out the catsup and then lick the package. Where the hell do you think that thing has been? How many infected dolts touched that thing you're licking? At least as many as have handled those soft drink cans that you put up to your lips and suck on. Not like they've been on a truck, handled by Teamsters, sitting on a shelf where some little rug monkey sneezed all over them. Or put in a vending machine by a guy who is definitely thoroughly washed his hands before touching them.
   
3. Idiotic news casts about stuff that isn't news yet. If I have to sit through one more "breaking story" broadcast featuring a story that isn't breaking I'm going to shoot some news anchors through their knee caps. You know what? Unless it involves an atomic attack within 50 miles of my farm, I don't care to be up on the breaking news. I'll wait until it is actually news.